this few weeks not feeling well... ytd and today having high fever... the worst thing is tat today my fever hit until 38.5 degree... it is so difficult to breath in and out... feel lyk dying soon... sian... hai... ytd doctor ask mi is it stress... and i say not sure... but eventually i quite stress... stress this and that... scare this and that... sometimes things are not easy to settle down... been myself it is so difficult... hai... really try my best to put everything aside... but do u know how hard it was... ppl ask me u still love him ma after ur break... i told them mayb i dun really love him tat much le... but den my heart is full of hurt... i everyday told myself i must forget... but i cant... it is hard... but i really trying my best just not to make anyone worry me... esp all my best friend, sister, brother and family... been my daddy bao bei... i dun seem tat i had short of anything... i wan pda daddy buy for me... wat i wan i will have... but i just could not find the one who really love me as much as i could... i just wan to be me... hai... lots of unhappiness each day... just trying to forget everything and start all over again... life is meaningless if everytime think this and that... hai... grandma every now and then ask me eat medicine... hai... but i dun wan eat... it is so difficult to swallow lo... hai... this morning eat medicine until cry... not i lyk baby is just that i smash everything into one cup of hot water... and it is so sour and bitter... hai... i hate to eat medicine... k la since i complaint everything le... now feeling better gonna go and rest... take care to myself... love myself...